This is most likely the new I-98 featured in the eponymous television series.
For those unfamiliar with the I-98 series, here are the relevant links:
- the background
- the pilot, opening episode
- the inferno, the second episode
- the chase, the third episode
The series was put on hold following an incident involving a high speed chase. I am happy to report that the series will be up and running but heavily censored, and could be pulled at any moment.
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I-98
Season 1, Episode 4
"The Bullet Train"
When we last left off, Thelma and Louise were on their way to eastern Montana, but ended up in Chicago. With the crashed Lamborghini they were up a canoe without a paddle, as the Muddy River Boys used to say. Meanwhile, Sam and Liam were still near Rugby, North Dakota, also without a car. [In the television series, there will be a Twin Peaks-like soundtrack, with a Don Pardo-voice over: "Previously, on I-98, ....]
The local authorities brought Sam and Liam up to date with the little information they had. And that was about all they had, little information: their yellow Lamborghini was stolen.
Liam said, "It could be worse."
"So, what do we do now?" Sam asked Liam. The good news was that the derailed highly-volatile Bakken crude oil train had only obstructed one set of tracks; the explosion had caused relatively little damage to the other tracks. Some years earlier, under pressure from the USDA chief, Warren Buffett had agreed to put in "the quadruple track," or the "QT" as it was known, across the northern tier. There was one dedicated track each for crude oil, agricultural products, Amtrak, and "the bullet train." Yes, Amtrak was still running but was pretty much a train for tourists without a time schedule or appointments to keep. On the other hand, BNSF saw an opportunity when airlines continued to charge high fees to fly into the Bakken. The BNSF bullet train would be passing through Rugby later in the day. Liam suggested they take the bullet train to Williston, which, they estimated, would take about an hour.
Most of the excitement outside of Rugby had died down. The ECNALUBMA had departed the scene; the ice cream truck had sold out of everything but "Michelle's Veggies," a small snack pack that never really caught on in the Midwest. Or the South. Or the North. Or really anywhere except Huntington Beach, California, where the snack packs made great fish bait for tourists fishing off the pier.
[Warren liked the "quadruple track." He had gotten the idea from his own quadruple bypass about that time and said "why not?" Charlie Munger wrote a best-seller on building the BNSF bullet train and the QT, titled, "Why Not?" Both Warren and Charlie were now sharing a room in a long-term assisted nursing care unit in downtown Omaha owned by Malia and Natasha.]
To save time, the bullet train no longer stopped at Minot. It didn't stop at Rugby either. It was a non-stop from Minneapolis Mall of America to Northstar Center in downtown Williston.
[Williston had expanded north to the "old 13-mile corner," now a way station along the I-98. At the intersection of I-98 and US 85 going south towards Williston there was another toll station for Minnesotans. Cars with Minnesota tags were expected to stop and pay a toll for using I-98; non-Minnesota tagged vehicles were exempt. Like the I-98 toll bridge across the Red River, the government did not need the funds, but Minnesotans were so used to paying taxes and tolls there were concerns that traveling free, going "cold turkey" as it were, would be too much for Minnesotans. Especially the older ones.]
The bullet train did not stop at Rugby on its direct non-stop to Northstar Center, but Liam had connections. Yes, the BNSF dispatcher said, the train could stop in Rugby due to the unusual circumstances. Liam and Sam caught a ride with the two Rugby patrolwomen to the pre-planned location where the bullet train would stop, near the Geographical Center of North America and Sprint Cell Phone Tower Obelisk. The Obelisk used to be a tourist destination but the wind farm pretty much obscured the Obelisk. But the old folks still knew where the Obelisk was.
Sam and Liam got out, walked over to the little picnic table and sat down, waiting for the train. The wind was blowing too fast for the wind turbines which were now sitting frozen in time. That was serendipity for Sam and Liam: without the turbines turning, they could hear themselves talk, although with the wind they had to talk a little louder than usual, and had to hold onto their Minnesota Twins baseball caps.
"I wonder what happened to the Lamborghini?" Sam asked, really to no one in particular. Liam was texting a note on his iPhone which came with its own briefcase because it was really too large to fit anywhere else.
Sam spoke again,"Who are you texting?"
"Pat, Jr." was the reply.
"Oh, over at Northstar Center?"
"Yep, need to get a new car."
"What are you thinking?"
"No question. A Tesla."
Liam had pretty much given up on electric cars. The Lamborgini turned out to be a real pain to re-charge, even with all the charging stations along I-98. Even McDonald's, who still did not allow folks to charge their computers INSIDE their restaurants, had charging stations OUTSIDE their restaurants. But with exploding batteries, poor range, and constant re-charging, Liam had finally decided that with the loss of the Lamborghini he had an opportunity to buy a Tesla.
Tesla started out building electric vehicles but switched back to conventional gasoline sports cars in the late 20's. 2027 or thereabouts. EVs never caught on but there was a small niche for EVs. It was called the "feel-good" niche. Liam had originally bought the Lamborghini EV to feel good, but he now felt as good as he thought he would ever feel, and decided a new feeling was what he needed. Like the feel of a muscle car. And with gasoline now costing 29 cents/gallon due to the flood of new oil found in the early 21st century, the price of gasoline was no longer a factor in deciding what kind of car to buy. It turned out CO2 was good for the environment, too, based on several studies financed by Exxon, BP, and Chevron.
Small talk ensued. But not for long. The bullet train would be arriving momentarily.
Meanwhile several hundred miles to the east, Thelma and Louise were still getting their bearings after being shaken up.
"Well, that sucks." Louise said to no one in particular. The Chicago police had arrived. It took awhile to sort things out, but the police took Louise and Thelma at their word: they were simply driving to the mall when they were cut off by some dude; taking evasive action resulted in a small fender bender. The fact that Louise was in a low-cut, highly-revealing blouse probably had nothing to do with how they were treated, but one wonders. They were given a "driving-while-blond" warning and taken to one of the local ObamaCare Small Unit Care Klinics (colloquially called OCSuCKS). Neither had ever enrolled in ObamaCare but that really didn't matter. Most Americans had never enrolled. Even the promise of an ObamaPhone with one's enrollment didn't seem to help. So, the government simply gave up. ObamaCare morphed into HillaryCare, the only real difference being that enrollment didn't matter any more.
Thelma spoke first, "So where do we go now?"
Louise looked up at the large screen in the waiting room with weather, transportation, and breaking news. The BNSF bullet train she noted, coincidentally, was due to be departing shortly. "If we run, I think we can make it."
"Run where? Make what?" Thelma asked.
"Quit, put out your cigarette -- [Thelma had just lit up her ever-present e-cig] -- and follow me."
Louise bolted; Thelma in quick pursuit.
[Twin Peaks-like music, Don Pardo voice-over, "Will Louise and Thelma catch the bullet train? Will the bullet train make an unscheduled stop at Rugby? Does anyone care?"]
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